My son has had behavioral problems from about the time he was three. There would be 45-minute to an hour tantrums of throwing, kicking, screaming and everything else associated with a full blown tantrum. When he went to preschool, my wife and I worked with his teacher to try and curb these tendencies.
It wasn't easy. He was having the same tantrums at preschool that he would have at home. There were several times when I had to come to school and pick up from the principal's office and many other times when he had to sit with the principal for a while to calm down.
We tried everything. When he went to kindergarten, we had hoped that it would change, but once again it was a hit and miss. He seemed to be finally growing out of the major tantrums and instead replaced with the a need to control. While I never had to pick him up, there were several times when he had to go sit with the principal to calm down.
The anger and tantrums had been replaced with control and defiance. Once again, we worked diligently with the teacher to get it under control, but it was still pretty dicey even at the end of kindergarten. Over the summer, we talked about being a big kid and respecting teachers and authority. I admit to apprehension when school started and waited for that first phone call from the principal. It never came.
A week went by. Two. Three. It was nearing the end of the first quarter and nothing at all. My wife and I were worried no one was telling us about things, but at the same time didn't want to jinx it by making the first call. When we went to the open house, I had the chance to talk to his teacher and she was completely blown away about his past.
My son has been the perfect student all year. No defiance. No outbursts, nothing. My son is an amazing child and I don't know what caused the change, but this year has been great and I tell him how proud I am of him every single day.