How loss impacts parenting

How loss impacts parenting

Making sense of loss.

When a parent loses a child, they often try and find a reason why God would take away their child. They need to find meaning in his or her death in order to make sense of it. In 2004, I lost my newborn primie son to an infection after six weeks.

The loss was devastating and to this day impacts my life daily. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about how he would have looked and how he would have made this world a better place. Loss of a child causes a parent to look at the world differently.

You realize that nothing is permanent and that everything can be snatched away in a moment. Fast forward many years later and I have three very healthy boys. It took a long time to come to terms with my son's death and find that meaning I had been searching for.

My son's death has made be a much better parent to my boys. I treat every second of the time that I spend with my children as precious. I refuse to miss school functions and try to give them as much fatherly advice as I can.

I realize that it can all be taken away in a moment and therefore I want to make use out of the time I have available. If something should happen to me tomorrow, I want my children to look back at me as adults and remember how much I loved them. I want to know that I am molding them to love their children and make them a focus in their lives.

The loss of my son was devastating and I would give anything to change his outcome, but I can't. All I can do his keep my son in my heart and let his brothers know that love transcends all boundaries.